My second gay pride of my life, the second in this beautiful, politically correct and government town.
Ottawa is known as a boring town. If you compare it to Montreal, of course it is, committing suicide would be an extreme sport, but I like the town the way it is. This year the parade was shorter, faster and smaller. Just let’s take a good example: the Public Pride Service, that means, government employees….last year there were 8, this, just 4 people, 2 were busy holding the poster. It was ridiculous, I wanted to march with them but a college at work said she would go, of course, she’s straight and I don’t know, since things aren’t working very well with my crazy and pathological peers, I got scared. After all, it was a wise decision.
When I was looking for a perfect spot for taking pictures I stared at the zoo lesbian fauna. Two very different halves were distinguished: the young radical dykes and the very old almost retired lesbians. 80% of them were in couple, and me? I was totally discourage when I checked the meat market. Is it possible to find a potential girlfriend? Should I quit? Should I become straight? No, I’m desperate but not so much. Ok, you can say I was depressed, of course I was but at least the parade made me cheer up…a bit.
I went alone this year, it was very hot outside, I was carrying my camera and I did 90 shots, I told you it was a short parade. I was sitting in a corner with a bunch of old dykes and butches. Nobody talked to me, of course, knowing I’m an antisocial plus shy, I didn’t try to make contact with them. I was melting under the sun that was giving us 30 degrees of hell on our skins…it was almost time for the start and suddenly, a group of young lesbians arrived. So, you can say, well, it’s the gay parade what’s so extraordinary about it? It would have been a normal dyke group just for the presence of somebody who until that moment was the reason of an old coincidence. Do you remember I wrote about an American dyke who left the US Army and asked for refugee status here in Canada? Yes, that girl came and they were just beside me. I was feeling like a jerk, totally uncomfortable. I wanted to write her when I saw the article about it on the gay journal. And there she was. She’s short, kind of skinny, wearing glasses more fashion than I wear. I realized she had a scar on her left arm. On it, she has a tattoo…the scar is around 7 cm. long, not so deep, the tattoo is just a gay line, the rainbow colours on int and a kind of draining drops, like blood but in colours. It was very significant for me. After knowing her story, I think she chose the best tattoo, simple, small and nice. I was glad she was having fun with her friends. It seems she is very involved in the Ottawa gay community.
I saw many groups, churches, communitarian groups, sports groups, even vegans, again old people and young radical political university groups. Also the roller derby girls were there, I loved it. The police, members of the Canadian Army in uniform even people from the Royal Canadian Mountain Police were there, yes, those guys disguised in red with a funny hat, they looked more like plushes than representation of authority, but it was cool, very impressive.
There was a party after the parade but I didn’t go, I just crossed the street and took my bus just dying to grab a beer. It was too hot outside, last year both senses of the avenue were reserved for the parade, this year was easy to come back home. It was very small group. Probably everybody was already on vacations.
I hate Summer. Another parade passed by, 25 years since the first one took Ottawa by surprise.
I was a bit sad for 2 things: the small gay groups in the parade and my fear for not join the Pride Public Service group. I suck, I know, but things at the tribunal are getting to my nerves and isn’t not the moment to do something able to turn back into me as discrimination, they have already troubles to talk to me and it’s hard. I wish things change soon. What are happening to my cards and my fantastic future?